Category Archives: Identity

WHO are we now that we have retired from education?

Lessons From the First Year: Geography Does Not Automatically Change You

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We just finished our first year of “slomadic” living, trying out different parts of the country and different styles of life with urban living in Omaha, Nebraska and beachside living in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. Along the way we learned a lot, but one of the biggest lessons has been surprisingly simple:

No matter where you go… there you are.

It is a cliche, but changing locations does not automatically create a different life or identity.

I think many people, especially those dreaming about retirement or relocation, just assume that a new environment will naturally transform them. Move near the beach and suddenly you become healthier, calmer, and outdoorsy. Move downtown and you become more social and cultured. Relocate to the mountains and somehow life becomes simpler and more peaceful.

Sometimes circumstances absolutely help. But our experience so far is that most of our internal habits traveled with us.I exercised about the same amount in Omaha as I did in Dallas. I was not magically better at meeting new people in South Carolina than I was in Nebraska. My personality, routines, and habits all packed themselves into the car and came with us 🙂

That realization has actually been helpful. Financially, this matters because ,in retirement, people often spend aggressively trying to solve problems that are not primarily financial:

  • burnout
  • dissatisfaction
  • loneliness
  • boredom
  • stress
  • unhealthy routines

A new house, a different city, or a dream retirement destination may improve your circumstances, but it does not automatically create personal transformation. That feels like an important counterbalance to some FIRE narratives. Financial independence creates capacity for change, but not automatic change itself.

FU money can remove constraints. It can buy flexibility, autonomy, and time. It can allow you to leave situations that are making you miserable. Those are incredibly valuable things. But money alone cannot independently create:

  • meaning
  • structure
  • relationships
  • discipline
  • purpose
  • community

Those things still require intentional effort, regardless of location.

In some ways, slow travel has actually highlighted this lesson more clearly for us because each move acts like a little reset button. You quickly discover which parts of your life were truly tied to location and circumstance and which parts were really tied to you. For me, one of the biggest lessons from year one has been realizing that while geography can support growth, it cannot substitute for it.

The encouraging side of that realization is that happiness may be more portable than we sometimes think. If you already enjoy simple routines, movement, exploration, reading, or spending time with people you care about, those things can travel with you almost anywhere.

The challenging side is that unresolved issues tend to travel too 🙂  

Lessons From the First Year: Every Major Life Upgrade Has Hidden Tradeoffs

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We just finished our first year of “slomadic” living, trying out different parts of the country and different styles of life with urban living in a small big city in Omaha, Nebraska and beachside living in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. One of the lessons we have learned is the importance of looking at both sides of every major life change.

It is very easy to focus on what we are gaining.  Everything from an oceanfront view and easy beach access to walkability and access to cultural activities. Those benefits are real, and they matter. But one of the biggest lessons from this year is that the more important question is often not just “What am I gaining?” but also “What am I giving up?”

People often evaluate life changes by focusing almost entirely on the positives:

  • better weather
  • Tax advantages
  • nicer scenery
  • slower pace of life
  • more free time
  • lower housing costs

But lifestyle decisions are rarely one-dimensional optimization problems. Every move introduces tradeoffs.  Even positive changes can come with losses:

  • distance from relationships
  • disruption of routines
  • social isolation
  • healthcare disruptions
  • reduced community connection
  • loss of identity tied to previous work or location

Some of those costs are financial. Many are emotional or social, which makes them much harder to measure and quantify.

That is one reason I think retirement and FI discussions sometimes become overly simplistic. Spreadsheets are great at modeling taxes, housing costs, investment returns, and withdrawal rates, but they struggle to capture things like loneliness, boredom, lack of purpose, or the stabilizing value of community and routine.

We have been trying to evaluate decisions more holistically during this process. Instead of asking only:
“Is this cheaper?” or  “Is this more beautiful?” We are also asking:  “How does daily life actually feel here?” and “What parts of our current life would we miss?”

For example, beach living in Myrtle Beach has been wonderful in many ways. We loved the scenery, the ability to walk on the beach regularly, and the slower pace. But it also came with tradeoffs:

  • smaller living space (and no real kitchen)
  • distance from family and long-term friends
  • a more transient social environment
  • Not walkable to stores and restaurants
  • tourist crowds at certain times of year

Similarly, urban living in Omaha gave us walkability, interesting neighborhoods, and a surprisingly vibrant downtown lifestyle, but it also came with weather realities and distance from many of the places and people we know best.

None of those tradeoffs automatically make a decision bad. They just make it more complicated than a simple “upgrade.”

I think this is especially important for early retirees and location-independent workers because freedom creates the ability to move frequently, but movement itself also has costs. Stability, routine, and community provided more emotional value (especially for Katie) than we realized while we still had them. One of the biggest lessons from our first year is that there may not be a perfect place or perfect lifestyle. There are simply different bundles of tradeoffs.

The goal is not to eliminate tradeoffs entirely, but to choose the ones that fit us best.  And to keep in mind that there is no one correct answer, but many choices that may be right for us 🙂 

Lessons From the First Year: Lifestyle Inflation Has a Hedonic Ceiling

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We just finished our first year of “slomadic” living, trying out different parts of the country and different styles of life with urban living in Omaha, Nebraska and beachside living in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. One of the lessons we have learned has been to be careful about making long-term decisions based on things that feel amazing in the short term but quickly become routine.

The ChooseFI community talks a lot about “hedonic adaptation” as one of the biggest hidden obstacles to financial independence. The basic idea is that people quickly adjust to improvements in lifestyle, income, possessions, or comfort. What initially feels luxurious slowly becomes normal, and the emotional boost fades much faster than the bill.

That idea connects directly to lifestyle inflation. As income rises, spending tends to quietly rise along with it. Bigger houses, newer cars, nicer hotels, upgraded neighborhoods, subscriptions, dining out, and premium experiences all start to feel justified because they are now “affordable.” The danger is that expenses expand just as fast as earnings, delaying financial independence indefinitely.

For most of our journey toward FI, Katie and I worked hard to avoid that trap. We tried to frame spending decisions around buying freedom instead of accumulating “stuff.” We were never particularly interested in keeping up with the Joneses, and we scratched our itch for luxury experiences without permanently inflating our lifestyle was through travel hacking using points and miles rather than higher spending.

It gets tougher in a nomadic life, though.  Instead of making one decision to buy a cheer house and then benefiting for years, every relocation gives us another opportunity to overspend.  So our challenge keeps resetting itself every time we move.

When you arrive somewhere new, it is very easy to convince yourself that certain upgrades are absolutely worth it. A slightly nicer neighborhood. A better beach view. A more walkable location. A premium gym. Better weather. More restaurants nearby. And honestly, some of those things really do improve quality of life.

The problem is that emotional adaptation happens quickly.

The ocean view that feels magical the first week may become the thing you barely notice while washing dishes. The rooftop lounge becomes background scenery. The upgraded apartment starts to feel normal instead of special. Financially, that matters because recurring lifestyle costs persist while emotional returns decay.

That does not mean upgrades are bad. Some improvements absolutely create durable satisfaction. Better health, lower stress, walkability, proximity to friends, and environments that align with your values can all be worth paying for. The key lesson for us has simply been to become more intentional about distinguishing between upgrades that create lasting value and upgrades that mainly create temporary excitement.

I think this becomes especially important in retirement and FI planning because permanent fixed expenses compound risk over time. Things like second homes, timeshares, boats, RVs, luxury neighborhoods, and high-maintenance lifestyles may sound exciting initially, but they also create ongoing financial obligations long after the novelty wears off.

Ironically, one of the things we are learning is that flexibility often produces more happiness than permanent escalation.

Temporary access to desirable experiences can outperform ownership both financially and psychologically. Spending a few months living near the beach may deliver much of the same joy as owning beachfront property, but without the taxes, insurance, maintenance, and long-term commitment. Visiting interesting places, rather than permanently upgrading every aspect of life, may actually preserve more appreciation and excitement over time.

At least for me, that has been one of the biggest lessons from year one. Sometimes the sweet spot is not maximizing luxury. It is creating enough flexibility that life continues to feel interesting before adaptation quietly turns everything back into normal

Lessons From the First Year: The Value of Temporary Living

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We just finished our first year of “slomadic” living, trying out different parts of the country and different styles of life. So far that has included urban living in Omaha, Nebraska and beachside living in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. Along the way, we have learned a lot, but one of the biggest lessons is that there are real advantages to medium-term stays and temporary living arrangements.

One of the big benefits of snowbirding, slow travel, sabbaticals, or extended rentals is that they allow you to test a future life before committing your capital to it. That may sound obvious, but I think many people underestimate how different a place can feel when you are actually living there instead of simply visiting.

That is the real financial insight for me: experience can be more valuable than ownership.

At first glance, renting for a few months may seem financially inefficient compared to buying. After all, you are paying rent without building equity. Because we still own our home in Texas, you could certainly argue that paying for temporary housing in another location at the same time is not the most optimized use of our money.

And mathematically, that is fair.

But when I compare a few months of rent to the potential cost of making a major relocation mistake, the equation changes pretty quickly. 

  • Buying in the wrong area
  • overestimating how often you will use a second property
  • Purchasing a “money pit” timeshare, RV, or boat that you won;t use enough
  • Misjudging the climate or pace of life
  • Locking yourself into a lifestyle you only liked in theory or in the short term

All of these can become enormously expensive lessons. In comparison, a few months of rent feels like cheap insurance 🙂

One thing we have learned repeatedly is that visiting a place and living in a place are completely different experiences. Vacations tend to highlight scenery, attractions, restaurants, and novelty. Daily life highlights grocery stores, traffic patterns, workout options, healthcare access, weather, and whether the rhythms of the place actually fit your personality. Those ordinary Tuesday factors matter a lot more than most people realize.

I think this idea is especially powerful for people pursuing financial independence or retirement. Many people spend years optimizing for a future life they have never actually tested. They dream about living in an RV, sailing around the world, relocating to the mountains, moving to a beach town, or settling into downtown urban life, but then commit large amounts of money before figuring out whether they truly enjoy the reality of those lifestyles.

Short-term trials create clarity. They reduce the odds of making expensive permanent decisions based on fantasy instead of experience. That may be one of the biggest lessons from our first year. Sometimes flexibility is more valuable than optimization, especially while we are still figuring out what kind of life we actually want to build.

Paying Off Your Home Isn’t the Windfall You Expect

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I was talking to a friend the other day who was excited about the rise in disposable income they expected when they were retired and “the house is paid off.”  If you also think your cost of housing will drop dramatically in retirement you may want to think again…

The Hidden Costs After Paying Off the Mortgage

Most of us assume that once the mortgage is gone, our monthly expenses will magically shrink. After all, housing is one of the biggest budget items, right?  But here’s the catch: even with a paid-off house, housing costs don’t disappear.  In fact, they continue to rise, and, recently, they have been rising fast.

Breaking Down Housing Costs

Here’s a rough breakdown of how the typical housing cost can be divided:

  • 1/3 Property taxes and insurance (variable)
  • 1/3 Principal and interest (fixed — if you have a mortgage)
  • 1/3 Utilities and maintenance (variable)

Once the principal and interest are gone, you’re still left with the other two-thirds — and unfortunately, they don’t stay steady just because the mortgage is gone.

Our Reality Check

When I was facing my early retirement date, we decided to pay off our mortgage a bit early rather than putting that money into the market.  There are good arguments for both sides, but for us the emotional impact of cash flow cushion was worth the impact on our investments and potential gains.  Mathematically it might not have been the right call, but for us it was.  Five years after paying off our mortgage, though, we assumed our cost of housing would have dropped significantly.  Instead, we have watched our housing expenses climb right back up to where they were before we were “debt-free.”

Here’s how it played out for us:

  • Our monthly housing cost (before mortgage payoff): $2,200
  • Five years after mortgage payoff, our monthly housing costs:
    • Property taxes: $600 (up from $400 just five years ago)
    • Insurance: $300 (used to be $150)
    • Utilities: $700 (energy, water, and other utility rates have all climbed significantly with inflation)
    • Maintenance/repairs: $600 (insurance deductible for replacing a roof, routine HVAC work, minor plumbing issues)
  • New monthly total: $2,200

That’s right — the same as before.  In only five years increasing costs have already eaten up the savings from no longer making principal and interest payments.  And the “cost to carry” is a number that will continue to go up (and up and up…).

Why Renting Might Make More Sense

This is why we can now rent a two-bedroom apartment in downtown Omaha for less than it costs to live in our fully paid-off house in suburban Dallas.  And this example doesn’t even get into the opportunity cost of having a big chunk of our net worth tied up in a home instead of being invested for growth! 

Here’s the mental shift:

Renting tells you the maximum you’ll have to pay. Owning tells you the minimum. The surprises? They’re on you.

And if you’re trying to control your retirement budget, predictability might be worth more than equity.

The Takeaway

Homeownership can be a path to wealth and stability.  But in retirement, your needs and priorities shift. Less maintenance, more flexibility, cost predictability, etc.

So before you assume that a paid-off house is your golden ticket to easy street, take a hard look at your actual expenses and think about how they will grow in the future.  It might be time to rethink what “home” means in the next phase of life.

The Superpower Behind Our Financial Independence

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I was at a conference recently where a speaker talked about the health benefits of getting outside and walking in nature, enjoying views, spending time near water, etc. The science is pretty clear: time outdoors lowers stress, improves mood, and boosts overall well-being.

But as I listened, I found myself thinking about something slightly different. It made me reflect on how two teachers got to financial independence so early. People often ask me for “the secret,” expecting some kind of financial arcana…a special investment strategy, insider knowledge, clever tax loophole, etc.

True FI people know the reality: Ninety percent of the money formula is simple. Over time, spend less than you earn and invest the difference.

That’s it.

The math isn’t complicated. The hard part is this: How do you spend less than you earn and still live a genuinely happy, fulfilling life?

Our Real Superpower

Katie has a phrase for this. She calls it our “low coolness threshold.” Simply put, we find joy in simple things. We don’t need the newest, most exclusive, or most expensive version of everything to feel like we’re living well.

Take Hawaii, for example. My work frequently takes us there.  It is a place that can drain a bank account quickly if you let it. There are helicopter tours, guided excursions, luxury dinners, private charters… all incredible experiences.

And we’ve done some amazing things there. But most days? We’ll grab snorkel gear and head to a public beach. We’ll pack lunch and have a picnic in a park. We’ll hike, swim, or just sit and watch the sunset.

But we don’t see it as deprivation. We do it because we genuinely enjoy it. That’s the key. It isn’t sacrifice if it’s what you actually prefer.

The Hedonic Treadmill

The ChooseFI community talks a lot about the “hedonic treadmill” or  the idea that as your income rises, your expectations rise with it. What once felt luxurious becomes normal. Then insufficient. Then embarrassing.

You upgrade the car. You upgrade the house. You upgrade the vacations. You upgrade the restaurants.

And suddenly your higher income doesn’t make you wealthier.  It just makes you more committed, more stuck in “the middle class trap.”

That treadmill is expensive. Keeping up with the Joneses isn’t just emotionally draining. It’s financially destructive. Our “low coolness threshold” has quietly protected us from that.

We bought an older starter home and didn’t upgrade. We drove used cars for over a decade. We skipped the flashy experiences in favor of the ones that felt meaningful.

Not because we’re anti-fun, but because we actually like simple.

Nature as a Financial Strategy

Here’s what struck me at that conference:

Stopping to smell the roses isn’t just good for your mental health. It might be the key to financial independence.

If you can train yourself (or discover within yourself) that a sunset is as satisfying as a luxury rooftop bar, you’ve unlocked something powerful. If a beach picnic feels just as good as a $200 dinner, you’ve reduced the cost of happiness. If a morning walk in a park competes with an expensive hobby, your savings rate increases without feeling like a sacrifice.

That’s not frugality for its own sake. That’s alignment.

The Bigger Picture

Financial independence doesn’t require monk-like discipline or joyless living.It requires clarity about what actually makes you happy and then intentionally spending on things that actually impact your happiness.

For us, that clarity has been a superpower. A low coolness threshold. 🙂

The world will always try to sell you a more expensive version of enjoyment. Bigger. Better. VIP access.

But sometimes the most profitable thing you can do is sit outside, breathe deeply, and realize you already have enough.

Something’s Got to Give

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HNL–LAS–OMA–DAL–BNA–MYR. Six airports. Four days.

Yes, some of those were just connections, but I still ended up sleeping in a different bed four nights out of five. Right now we’re in Dallas for a bridal shower, which meant my presence wasn’t exactly required. So I slipped away to my old pool for a swim, trying to shake off the travel rust.

That’s where I ran into an old friend who looked at me like I’d dropped out of the sky (and I guess I kind of did) “I thought you guys were in a different state! Don’t you get tired of traveling so much?”

I gave her a non-committal answer and turned the conversation back to her and the things that she has going on, but I thought about her question while I was working out. The answer is, unsurprisingly, both yes and no.

Travel is incredible. It brings professional opportunities, new places, and connections with people all over the country. But the instability that comes with it? That part can be exhausting. And yes, I fully recognize the privilege in saying that. Complaining about working in Hawaii and Myrtle Beach, or about driving our old car or having to borrow goggles because my new things is stashed in another state? These are very much first-world problems. Still, when you’re navigating early retirement, these are the kinds of challenges you eventually face.  Even for people not on the FIRE path, there’s a universal question here: how do we choose between competing priorities?

Work. The work of “adulting” we all have to do (Bills, Doctor’s appointments, maintenance of our possessions, etc.). Family and friends. Hobbies. There’s never enough time for everything. And too often, the culture in the U.S. pushes us to put our careers first, no matter what it costs the rest of our lives.

I assumed things would feel different once Katie and I retired. But the truth? We still have to make choices, and we still wrestle with whether they’re the right ones. I’m not immune to “one more year syndrome” — the temptation to take on another contract, another job, another project, especially when the offer comes from a cool place or an organization I’d love to help.

Katie and I are slowly learning how to say no. This year, I stepped away from my adjunct professor role, and she gave up her virtual teaching gig. Those were steps in the right direction. But is it enough? We’ve already talked about limiting how much contract work I take in the future even further, so we can actually enjoy all the fun places we’re trying on for size instead of rushing through them.

So here’s the question I’ll leave you with (whether you’re retired or still deep in the 9-to-5): How do you decide between competing priorities? Do you use a system? A rule of thumb? Gut instinct? I’d love to hear how everyone else navigates the trade-offs in their own lives. Drop a comment below or send me a message.  Your strategies might be exactly what I need or what someone else in this community needs to hear.

How Much Did the First 24 Hours in Omaha Cost?

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We’re one full day into our first “slomad” journey and are settling into our new home in Omaha, Nebraska. I get a lot of questions about costs, and, even though we’re renting furnished places, I’ve also been curious about what unexpected expenses might pop up during these moves. So here’s a breakdown of everything we spent in our first 24 hours in Omaha:

Lodging

We pulled into town around noon and moved into our place. It’s a fully furnished, utilities-included two-bedroom apartment right on the edge of the Old Market neighborhood in downtown Omaha. At $1,500 a month, that comes out to about $50 per day of lodging.

Exercise

A couple of blocks away, we checked out the neighborhood YMCA. Our building has a decent workout room, but Katie and I swim a lot and we wanted access to a pool, plus classes and the chance to be social. I bargained away the joining fee by agreeing to pay the first month up front. For both of us, with full access to every YMCA in the region, it’s $75/month—or $2.50 for the first day.

Library

On the way back, we ducked into Omaha’s downtown public library. It was spacious, modern, and definitely a place we’ll return to when we want a work spot outside the apartment. We signed up for cards for $0 and now have access to meeting rooms, printers, copiers, and, of course, endless digital and physical media.

Household Goods & Groceries

Our next trip was to grab some household essentials and groceries. Honestly, I was worried we’d need a lot, but the apartment was remarkably well equipped.  They even gave us starter sets of consumables like paper towels, soap, and laundry detergent. That said, we still picked up a Brita filter, a laundry basket, a drying rack, and a few other upgrades, most of which will stay behind when we move out.

  • Groceries: $52
  • Household odds and ends: $121 → amortized over our stay: $1.15 for day one

Dinner Out

By the time we finished shopping (and skipped lunch), we were starving. Friends had suggested Pizza Ranch, a buffet I was skeptical of until we tried it. Yes, it’s family-friendly, but the food was solid: salad bar, pizza, fried chicken, dessert, the works. Maybe more than we should have eaten, but worth it 🙂  $37 for the two of us.

Free Fun

The next morning, I used the new gym membership, then Katie and I took a long walk around downtown, hung out at a park, and even tried out the public hammocks. Cost? $0

Day One Total: $152.15

So, what did we learn?

  • Furnished rentals can save big money. Filling a place from scratch adds up fast; Furnished Finder has already proven cheaper and easier.
  • Hidden costs still pop up. Even with a well-stocked apartment, there are always “little” things you want—like a water filter or a laundry basket—that need to be budgeted for.
  • Entertainment doesn’t have to cost much. Libraries, parks, and neighborhood walks are free, and they’re going to be a bigger part of our lifestyle as we check out different locations.
  • Life has a baseline cost. A chunk of this spending—food, exercise, even some household items—would have happened whether we were home or traveling.  Too often we look at all travel expenses as additional money out of pocket, but if I am buying groceries here, I am not buying them in Texas.  Even the monthly YMCA expense just replaces a gym membership that we cancelled last week.

When you look at it that way, traveling isn’t necessarily more expensive than staying put. In fact, with the right planning, it can be cheaper and a lot more fun.

Of course this was just day one in Omaha. We’re curious to see how the averages shake out as the days and weeks go on, but so far, the experiment looks promising 🙂